Two Tiaras and a Sword

Monday, March 28, 2011

Okay, I Admit It

Okay, I admit it.  I am having a pity party.  It just seems like in every direction I turn I am discouraged.  Satan has been throwing fiery darts of lies at me for several months now...and the sad thing is that after so long, I'm tempted to believe them.

"Look at the lack of motivation in your students.  If you were a good teacher.  You could motivate them."

"You are wearing that dress, again?"

"Your clothes are out of style.  You could be the poster girl for What Not To Wear."

"Your kids enjoy being with your husband more.  He is more fun than you."

"You can't serve God.  You are a looser in everything."

"The girls in your teen group like Mrs. ______  better than you.  After all, she is so much more put together than you are."

Then there are the circumstances...Some of my students really are doing poorly.  But, the Lord knows I have done every thing I know to do to encourage them.  Yes,  I have neglected my wardrobe...I am definitely not a fashion plate.  But I don't dress to please others.  I dress to please the Lord.  My husband is the one that has the energy to play with the kids, when I feel like I'm going to drop.  But they still beg for my attention as well, and come to me with needs that only a mommy can fill.  I do feel as though nothing I touch is going well right now.  But I know that this is just a "season" and things will change and get better.  And Mrs. ______ IS much more put together than I. And I should not view her as a threat, but tap into her knowledge and love for my girls to help them grow into even greater Christians.  

But it's days like this, that I just want to sit down and cry.  So I will.  I will cry.  I will cry out to the Lord.  The One who thought so much of me, that He went to a cross and died for me ( John 3:16).  The One who formed me in my mother's womb (Ps. 139:13).  The One who cares about me, and the things that matter to me (I Peter 5:7).   (Eph. 4:1) The One who has called me to be in the position I am in to minister to this group of girls.  The One loves me more than I can imagine.  And again, I will hold up my shield of faith and withstand those fiery darts that Satan is sending my way.  I will matter how many days, months, or even years I am under attack, listen to Satan.  I will be me.  The me that God in His love and infinite wisdom made me to be.  I am not here to please others, or win a popularity contest.  I am here to do what God has called me to do.  So I will do it. Wholeheartedly.  Day by day.  In God's strength, and with God's help.  (Rom. 8:31)!

Maybe you too have been plagued by some of the same sort of lies from Satan.  Maybe different lies...but Satan knows just where to hit us doesn't he?  If Satan is speaking lies to your heart today, you can overcome those lies.  First, recognize them as what they are...LIES (John 8:44).  Second, know that God is the God of truth (Titus 1:2).  Third, know that if you are saved, greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world (1John 4:4).  And last...take a few minutes to look up verses that speak truth against the lies that Satan is sending your way.  Commit those verses to memory, and the next time Satan comes at you with those lies, do what Jesus did...and use God's Word against him.  Then sing praises to the Lord who loves you and made you just as you are!

Sunday, March 27, 2011


I woke up this morning thinking about her.  How she must have felt.  Wondering if she was scared.  Thinking of how excited she had to have been.  Scared...possibly.  Excited...definitely.  Apprehensive...more than likely.  I bet she thought...How in the WORLD am I going to tell him?  How in the WORLD am I going to explain this to everyone?  Will they believe me?  Will they laugh at me?  Will they hate me?    I can't believe this is happening to me!

The Bible doesn't give us a lot of details...just that she pondered these things in her heart.  I would love to have known what was going through her mind at that time, and just what all that pondering included.  Times were WAY different then...and I am sure the next 9 months...possibly the rest of her life went nothing like she had dreamed or planned. Not in a bad way, just in a different way. I am sure there were those that claimed to be her friends that now shunned her.  Maybe those that were already jealous of her that reveled in her "shame".  We do know that she went to visit her cousin Elizabeth.  I think it was because she needed the support and love of someone who believed in her.  Someone who would not judge her.  Someone who loved God enough to believe in the miracle growing inside her.

There are times life, when we are falsely accused.  Times when people who claim to be our friends shun us.  Times when those who already don't like us are looking for a reason to kick us while we are down.  And maybe, like her, we have done absolutely nothing to deserve the judgment and accusations flung our way.  Maybe our intentions were completely pure and right...and we are just doing our best to serve the Lord...and now it seems the whole world is against us.  Then like her, we should ponder these things in our heart...we should not lash out in anger.  We should take our hurts and our fears to the Lord.  And if God puts an Elizabeth in our life, we can spend time wrapped in her loving, supportive arms.  And we should carry on.  Continue in the work of the Lord.  Keep doing what we do for the Lord's sake.
What if she had caved in?  What if she had not been strong enough to do what the Lord asked of her?    Where would we all be now? 

God has great plans for all of us.  We cannot cave in.  We have to carry out the work He has for us to do.  So for our precious Lord, and for those that come behind us,  let's do that work with the right spirit and attitude, regardless of what comes our way!

Saturday, March 26, 2011

A World of Uncertainties

Hebrews 13:5-6 states..."Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.  So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me."

This world is FILLED with uncertainties.  And although I have not lived as tough a life as many people I know, I have faced trials and tough times.  Yet through it all, one thing is as certain as it gets...God will never leave me nor forsake me.  He will walk with me through every twist and turn in my life.

A few examples:
1. "You are having contractions 5 min. apart.  I'm sending you to the hospital to see if we can stop the labor" -God was there.
2.  Three months of complete bed rest to ensure the birth of a healthy baby...with a one year old toddler. - God was there. 
3.  Our boss says, "I'm moving to a new ministry." Our lives are instantly on shaky ground.  Will the new pastor want us to stay?  Or do we need to begin looking for a new ministry as well?  - God was there.
 4.  Our lease was up. A For Sale sign was in the yard.  Do we buy the house uncertain of our future in the ministry there? Or do we look for a new place to live?  - God was there.
5. "Mom took Dad to the hospital today.  He couldn't breathe.  You might need to come home." - God was there.
6.  "The rehab center called.  Dad took a turn for the worse.  We need to get to the hospital now." - God was there.
7.  "There is nothing further we can do.  The family needs to make a decision.  We will meet at 2:00 tomorrow." - God was SO there.
8. When we buried him.  - God was there
9.  "It is cancer.  Next to my spine.  They want to do treatments to see if they can shrink it." -God was there.
10.  "I'm in so much pain, sometimes I just pray to God to go ahead and take me home." - God was there.
11.  When she needed me to help her just to do some of the most basic functions of life, and I had to return the favor for all she had done for me all my life. -God was there.
12. When we buried her next to my Daddy.. -God was there.
13.  "You are definitely pregnant, but we are not finding a heartbeat.  It could be that it is too early.  We are going to send you for some blood work, and then we want you to come back next week for another ultrasound." - God was there.
14.  When she was born 9 months later, and the Dr. rejoiced and prayed with us. - God was there.
15.  When we did change ministries, and my son had a terrible time adjusting. -God was there.
16.  When I realized we were dealing with a learning disability. - God was there.
17.  When we learned that my mother-in-love is facing cancer.  Again.  For the THIRD time. - God is here.
18.  When we learn a beautiful child in our extended family has leukemia, and a long battle ahead of her. -God is here.
20.  When it seems as though the world has gone crazy around us and countries are fighting amongst themselves. - God is here.
21.  When the earth trembles, and waves wipe out whole communities.  -God is here.
22.  When my own little corner of the world is upended, and my life as I know it may change, and everything around me seems uncertain...God is here.

I don't know about you...but I just needed those verses and that list..The reminder that in a world of uncertainties, one thing is certain, and that is the fact that God always has been, is, and always will be with me.  He will never leave me nor forsake me.  He will walk with me through every trial that comes my way, and when we (the Lord and I) walk out on the other side.  I will be more like Him and He will receive the honor and glory for it.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Standing Alone

I told my husband the other day, that as every day passes, I feel like we stand alone in our convictions. 

We do not condone lying.  Yet we know that there are those both children and adults with whom we have close contact that think nothing of lying about both big and little things everyday.

We do not allow our children to watch things that are against what the Bible says is pure and witches, wizards, warlords, idiot parents without a clue, or any authority figures made to look like idiots for that matter,  people treating others without respect,  sex before marriage...etc.  Yet others seem to think nothing of letting their children consume garbage like the above on a regular basis.

We do not allow our daughter to date or have a boyfriend.  She is 13!  She has NO business dating.  She is welcome to be friends with all of the boys she knows, but not to be girlfriend to any of them.  We have talked about this...a boy tells her he "loves" her...but just the week before, he was telling some other little girl how much he "loved" her.  Does he love either of them?  No!  He is "in love" with the idea of having a girlfriend.  When she told him she was not interested in having a boyfriend at this time, he quickly moved on to another little girl whom he "loved."  Why are kids having  sex before marriage?  Because we are allowing them to become much too intimate way too soon.

We do not allow our children to have a bad attitude.  Now I am not saying that they don't have one from time to time, but when they do...we deal with it.  They are not allowed to talk back, raise their voice, slam doors, or roll their eyes.  They are allowed to come respectfully to us and discuss civilly anything they feel is unreasonable or unfair.

But in all of these things...even in the mostly Christian circles which we associate, I still feel as though we stand alone.  We are looked at like we are crazy when we have to tell our daughter no, she can't watch the movie that all of her friends are going to see.  Do those parents not know what the movie is about?  Do they not care?  Are they blind to the affects that the movie will have on the innocence of their girls.  Do they not care about how Satan will use the movie to separate their daughters from Christ, or righteous living.  If I let my daughter see a movie that involves teen involvement in the occult, or teen I not saying it is okay for her to do those things?  I might say NO with my words, but if I let her go see that movie, I am saying yes with my actions...And we all know what they say about actions speaking louder than words.  My teen does not have the maturity level or experience to make wise decisions when it comes to what is best for her.  Which is why God has given her father and I that responsibility.  If I allow her to go see or hear or do something He does not want her to see or hear, or do...then I am held responsible.  Before God.

And so...I choose lonely.  And I choose looks from other parents that think I am crazy.  And I choose to stand alone.  And I choose to protect my children.  And I choose lonely children over popular, ungodly children.  And I choose to please God.

Choosing to stand alone for the sake of my children,